You are more than what you give ❤️

I have had the privilege of knowing some of the most caring souls—people who would give you the shirt off their back if you asked. I see it in the people I love, the clients I support, and in myself. That deep desire to help, to heal, to hold space. It’s beautiful. It’s a gift. But it can also be a weight that slowly erodes who we are if we’re not careful.

I know this all too well.

For a long time, I believed my worth was tied to how much I could do for others. It felt safe to be needed. It felt good to be the one who showed up, who fixed, who soothed. But over time, I started noticing something—I was exhausted. Not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually. And yet, I kept giving. Because somewhere deep down, I feared that if I stopped, if I said no, if I set boundaries, then I would no longer be valuable.

Trauma has a way of shaping us into givers. It teaches us that love is earned, that safety comes from being agreeable, that we have to prove ourselves through self-sacrifice. Helping becomes more than an act of kindness—it becomes an identity. But we are so much more than what we do for others.

Healing means learning to give from a place of abundance, not depletion. It means knowing that you are enough, that you are still worthy even when you say no. Finding this balance isn’t easy, but it is necessary. Here’s where to start:

• Practice saying no – Even when it’s uncomfortable. Even when the guilt creeps in. No is a full sentence, and it doesn’t make you any less kind or compassionate.

• Go to therapy – Exploring the roots of the “helper” identity can reveal why it feels so hard to stop over-giving. Therapy, especially EMDR, can help rewrite those old survival-based beliefs.

• Nurture yourself first – You can’t pour from an empty cup. Rest, play, and reconnect with yourself beyond what you do for others.

• Surround yourself with people who don’t just take – Seek out relationships that feel reciprocal, that see you beyond what you can offer.

You are not just a helper. You are a whole, complex, radiant being who deserves as much love and care as you so freely give. You are valuable simply because you exist. You are worthy when you put yourself first. You are everything—just as you are.

Let’s commit to holding onto ourselves while we hold space for others. ⚘

My Journey with Chronic Pain

Pain has been a part of my life since the day I was born. While I don’t have memories of those early years, my body does. Growing up, I absorbed messages like no pain, no gain and put your big girl pants on—words that taught me to push through, to disconnect from what my body was trying to tell me. Injury after injury, pain after pain, until I couldn’t ignore it anymore.

It was stealing from me—my relationships, my joy, my movement, my experiences. I tried everything: endless medical appointments, test after test, medication after medication, only to be met with little relief and even less understanding. I didn’t know what else to do.

So, instead of running from it, I turned toward it. I stopped seeing my pain as the enemy and instead, began listening to it. What if my pain wasn’t punishing me, but trying to guide me back to myself? I learned to move in ways that were kind and gentle, to explore where I could push and when I needed to rest. I found a team of practitioners who saw me and supported me—week after week, without judgment.

When I was diagnosed with Central Sensitization Syndrome, everything clicked. My body wasn’t broken; my system was just sensitive to pain and threat. And that was okay. I started EMDR therapy, learning to bring safety back into my body, to let go of the story that I would be in pain forever.

Pain-free days are a gift, but so are the painful ones. They remind me to rest, to savour comfort foods, to curl up with my dog and a good book. I love those days just as much as I love the days I push myself in the gym or on a hike.

Managing chronic pain is often an invisible, deeply personal journey. But you don’t have to do it alone. Find the people who bring you safety, curiosity, and kindness. Shift your relationship with your body, and over time, your pain.

EMDR can help desensitize and rewire your brain’s response to pain signals. If you’re ready to try, I’m here. I promise to hold your pain the way you deserve. Call me ❤️

February & Self-Love

Ah, February—the month of love. Hearts, roses, and grand romantic gestures. But let’s talk about the kind of love that took me years to prioritize: self-love.

Loving myself has been anything but easy. Growing up in the culture and environment I did, comparison and impossible standards made me feel like I was never enough. And when I stepped into my professional counselling journey, a whole new set of insecurities came knocking. Was I good enough? Did I belong here? Could I even help anyone? Why don’t I sound like that person?

On top of that, my body was in constant pain. Everything hurt—my mind, my body, my soul. It felt like no part of me was at peace. Until one day, I decided I was done trying to fit into someone else’s mold. I let my freak flag fly.

I started unlearning who I had been told to be and, little by little, let my authentic self out. I prioritized softness—learning to appreciate my body not for how it looked but for the way it carried me, even in pain. And slowly, everything changed.

If I hadn’t embarked on this journey of self-love, I wouldn’t be here today, running my own private practice, doing what I love. I’m still learning, still growing—but I can safely say, it feels damn good to love yourself.

So, this month of love, don’t forget the most important person in your life—you. ❤️

A Year of Growth & Gratitude

As the year comes to a close, I find myself reflecting on the incredible journey it’s been—a year of lessons, growth, and stepping fully into my heart’s calling.

Starting SOUL & SCIENCE COUNSELLING has been one of the most fulfilling and humbling experiences of my life. It’s not just about building a business; it’s about creating a space where healing, connection, and transformation can thrive. Each session, each story, and each shared moment reminds me of why I chose this path.

But this year hasn’t come without its challenges. From navigating the business side of things and experiencing surprising changes in my person life pushed me far out of my comfort zone. I faced doubts and fears I didn’t know were buried in me. Yet, every uncomfortable moment held a lesson—reminders of resilience, trust, and the power of leaning into discomfort to grow.

I’m profoundly grateful for the support and encouragement I’ve received along the way. Whether from family, friends, or the wonderful clients who’ve trusted me with their journeys, your belief in me has been a guiding light.

This year has reaffirmed something I hold close: we’re all here to grow, to heal, and to honour the callings of our hearts. For me, that calling is healing—to walk alongside others on their path to healing and to create a space where science and soul come together.

Thank you for being part of this chapter. Here’s to another year of growth, connection, and purpose.

With heartfelt gratitude,
Alyssa <3

Discomfort is the Space Where Growth Grows

If I’m honest, I’ve been sitting with a lot of discomfort lately. Running a counselling practice means spending my days doing what I love—connecting with people, holding space for healing, and witnessing growth. But there’s another side to this work: the business side. And let me tell you, it’s not my comfort zone.

Learning about marketing, bookkeeping, and all the behind-the-scenes logistics feels like stepping into a world that’s completely foreign. Doubt, fear, and anxiety have been frequent companions as I navigate this space. Some days, I catch myself wondering, Am I cut out for this?

But here’s what I know: leaning into discomfort is where growth lives. It’s not easy, and it doesn’t feel good in the moment, but it’s necessary. Much like the healing journeys I witness in my clients, growth often comes through the messy, uncertain, and uncomfortable moments. When we allow ourselves to stay with what feels hard—to breathe through it rather than run away—we find strength and resilience we didn’t know we had.

I’m learning to remind myself that every awkward email I send, every spreadsheet I struggle to build, is an act of courage. And with each step, I’m expanding—not just as a business owner but as a person.

So, if you’re facing your own discomfort right now, know this: you’re not alone. Growth is waiting on the other side, and together, we can lean in ❤️